kismetism

So this year’s New Years log is a little different from usual, eh? I’ll admit that I toyed with the idea of quitting logging. The fact that I forget to flip, that I more often had nothing to say than something, that I’m now missing entries for a month’s worth of time… not to mention my dissatisfaction with the visual appearance of the space I was writing in.

And then the new year, along with its imperative of reminiscing and resolutioning, rolled in and I was suddenly choked with things I needed to put to words… and no space to write them in.

So here’s my space that I set up in less than an hour, for the indeterminate future. Arguably the biggest “problems” with my previous weblog were in all the strictures I set for myself: new designs/images every month (that died fast), new entry every day, lists of categories and tags to keep track of. So this time we’ll try the opposite tack: no rules or regulations. Just pure, unadulterated whimsy.

Anyway. Onto the sentimental part.

This has been an extremely eventful year, and a hard one, for reasons I don’t want to go into. I’m being challenged on all fronts to do better, be better, cope better… academically and intellectually, personally and emotionally. It’s so very trying and overwhelming and sometimes I’m surprised to find I’m still somewhat sane.

I am frightened and I am drained. It feels like I’m driving and driving and trying not to fall asleep at the wheel. I wish I knew where I was going. I wish I knew if I will like it there. I wish I knew who is going to be there to greet me.

Ringing in two thousand ten. May you bring peace for our hearts, clarity for our minds, and freedom from our ghosts.